Vader marries in private ceremony

CATO NEIMOIDIA – In a private ceremony at a beach on Cato Neimoidia, Darth Vader has married longtime girlfriend Visas Marr.

Marr, now Marr-Vader, and Vader both wore black in the intimate ceremony of about two dozen friends and imperial officers.

Vader had no known offspring in attendance, although Marr-Vader’s daughter from a previous marriage acted as ring barer.

“I wouldn’t say it was a beautiful ceremony, but it was a ceremony” said Vader family friend and co-worker Admiral Firmus Piett.

“Vader was never one for pomp and circumstance,” he added. “We just considered it a success since he didn’t choke anyone.”

It isn’t known if the happy couple will start a family soon, but gossip columnist Flim Freezone isn’t afraid to speculate.

“If Vader ever had kids, you know they’d be great. Great for the empire and great for his career.”